An Inkling
Brother Dan wasn’t trying to
be controversial. (I’m talking about Dan
Cathy, President of Chick-fil-A.) But controversial
he was, which you undoubtedly saw last week, unless maybe you were vacationing
somewhere beyond Mars. Controversial as
in being called a hateful homophobe, and being told by the mayors of Boston and
Chicago that Chick-fil-A is no longer welcome in their cities.
And I thought the presidential
campaign was getting ugly! Dan is
neither hateful nor a homophobe. But his
experience is one we can learn from.
(And since there’s a lot to learn, get ready for a long one….)
Jesus told his disciples that
he wanted them to be “wise as serpents, but innocent as doves.” If we think of the latter as being simply
telling the scripture’s truth, then the former points us toward giving
attention to how we tell it. How can we
get the best possible hearing for that truth?
That’s the serpent end of the deal – being judicious and strategic in
how we speak about controversial matters.
First, let’s not assume that anything
we say about the sexual ethics and marriage controversies is simply “in
house.” Dan Cathy was being interviewed
by a Baptist publication, and he spoke as to those who shared his beliefs. That can work when we’re conversing with
fellow Christians in person. But we must
assume that anything which goes beyond this moment and this room – be it printed,
cyber, or whatever – will reach a broader audience. And those “wise as serpents” will speak
accordingly.
Second, know that the
advocates for revising sexual ethics and marriage practices have their own
“serpents,” who have successfully cast most such conversations in the mode of
“do you agree with me or are you a bigot?”
That’s a “heads I win, tails you lose” scam. Rather, choose your forum and form with a
view to communicating fully both the truth of the scripture, and the grace that
makes the truth life-giving. That pretty
much rules out sound byte exchanges.
Instead, look for settings where you can have a real conversation, or at
least the means of communicating a full message.
Third, let that message begin
with our own need for God’s grace – something like, “considering the logs in
our own eyes, we’re not crusading to remove specks from others’ eyes. But we do believe that life works best when
lived in the ways the Creator designed.”
Fourth, don’t stop with God’s
Creator stake in this. Be sure you get
to his Redeemer role – something like, “we’re grateful that the One who
designed us also redeems us in every area of life. And we need his redemption in our sexuality and
marriages as much or more than anyone.”
Fifth, don’t get pulled into
the escalation of contempt. As soon as
the mayors of Boston and Chicago cast their scorn on Dan Cathy, the web lit up
with Christians casting scorn on them.
Jesus is not served thereby.
Sure, let’s confront those whose voices for “tolerance” are (ironically)
intolerant. But let’s not follow them in
tone. We are set apart by the kindness
and vulnerability with which we speak the truth, not by the correctness of our
arguments.
Sixth, let’s find forums for
controversial conversations other than dueling boycotts. The Kingdom is not advanced by eating more
“chikin” or less Ben and Jerry’s. There
is a time and place to speak to corporations about their values. But high volume exchanges about where we’re
taking our business does little to win hearts to what matters most, and only
plays into the opposing “serpent’s” desire to cast Christians as shrill and
simplistic.
Lastly, let’s learn together
as we go, and be supportive of each other.
We’re going to need it. For however
well we join “serpent” with “dove,” in a hateful world we are all guaranteed to
get a taste of Dan Cathy’s controversy. And
let’s make sure we also get a taste of his wonderful “chikin”!
Bless Dan!
Keith
